


Dean's limit

by zation



Series: The shorties [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Coming In Pants, Coming Untouched, Drunk Dean, Efficient Cas, First Time, Grace-induced prostate massage, Inappropriate Use of Grace, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Not Beta Read, Prostate Exam, Prostate Massage, Some Humor, Sorry Not Sorry, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-29
Updated: 2015-06-29
Packaged: 2018-04-06 19:33:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4234026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zation/pseuds/zation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has a problem he’d rather not talk about, thank you very much. Except he figures he kinda has to and whom to turn to if not Castiel, the friendly neighborhood angel?</p><p>Or,</p><p>The one where Dean experiences Cas’ grace in a rather <em>intimate</em> way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dean's limit

**Author's Note:**

> I totally scanned Google for about five minutes about male anatomy and the prostate in preparation of writing this so don’t say I never did nothing :D  
> That being said I completely wash my hands of the accuracy of it. I like writing sloppy porn and that’s the extent of this fic. Thank you!

  


Dean paced the motel room impatiently, his stomping made somewhat lopsided by all the whisky he had been downing but he didn’t care about that. Not about drinking himself stupid (because obviously this was a _great_ idea) and not about walking straight. Dean was at his limit about this and now was the perfect moment to take care of his problem. Sam had left not too long ago to do research or, as Dean suspected, hit on the hot librarian because fuck knew she wasn’t into Dean and they had already done all the research they needed. It was a salt and burn, just find the goddamn grave, Sammy! Jesus.

Dean whipped around when he felt the familiar rush of air and sure enough, there was Cas.

"You prayed, Dean?"

Stern face and everything, yes, Cas would definitely help him and not judge him or anything. He wasn’t even sure the angel was capable of judging based solely on circumstances like these.

"Cas." He slurred and stumbled over. Had to reach out and grab Cas’ lapels to steady himself. "You’re a fucking lifesaver."

Cas frowned because when didn’t he? "Dean, you are inebriated."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." Dean grinned crookedly but Cas just continued to frown. Okay, yeah, get to the point. Cas probably had other businesses or whatever.

"Dean, I will help you if you need it but I think we should talk when you have sobered up."

"No!" Dean tugged at Cas’ trench coat the way a child may tug on a parents clothes (see me, hear me) and Cas thankfully remained where he was. "No I needed to be fucking drunk to say this, alright?"

Cas’ brow drew together but he didn’t tilt his head to the side. Okay, so he was concerned but not concerned enough to not be annoyed. Dean knew those tells now, could see them more clearly than he thought the angel knew.

"Dean, where is Sam?"

Dean’s eyes rounded out. "Oh fuck no, I’m not tellin’ Samsquatch this."

Cas sighed. "Tell me what ails you, then, let me help."

"Yeah." Dean licked his lips. "Yeah, alright." He cleared his throat but remained silent for another minute. Fuck, this was hard to admit, even to trusting Cas. Cas who just stood there with a neutral expression and yeah, Cas wouldn’t laugh at him. Dean swallowed and focused on the alcohol in his system, let it propel him forwards so that he was leaning in with his mouth close to the angel’s ear. "I think there is something wrong with my prostate." He whispered and realized in the moment Cas cocked his head to the side that he probably hadn’t needed to lean in. Angelic hearing, right? He could probably have been standing on the other side of the room. The town. The country? He sniggered at himself.

Cas was frowning again when Dean pulled out but he wasn’t laughing. Phew.

"Why would you say that, Dean?" he asked and okay, there was no amount of liquor that would make admitting this easy.

"I…" Dean harrumphed and made to step back but stumbled clumsily. Cas’ hand shot out to steady him because that was what he did. Steadied things and such. "It’s not… when I jack off and stuff…" he mumbled, face red and eyes averted but Cas wasn’t satisfied with that, of fucking course.

"It’s not what, Dean?"

"I don’t really get hard, alright?" Dean almost yelled (but remembered the paper thin walls of these fugly motels) and took a shuddering breath. "I mean, I get kind of hard but not like usual and I don’t come, okay? I haven’t fucking come in forever."

Cas drew up to regard Dean and it made Dean nervous, even in his drunkenness. "For how long?"

Dean shrugged. "I dunno, two weeks?" 15 days, 19 hours, 35 minutes, 12 seconds. 13. 14. 15. "Can you help me or not?"

Cas’ features actually softened and it was a look Dean had forgotten the angel could summon. It made him look awfully human. "Dean, I am not a doctor, you should see a physician about this."

"Oh hell no!" Dean flailed to get Cas’ hand off his arm and tried backing away forcefully but stumbled, again. "I’m not letting a dude stick a finger up my ass. And I had to be fucking drunk to tell _you_ this, I’m not telling anyone else, ever."

"I am honored that you chose to tell me." Yeah, Dean blushed at that so… okay. "But I am uncertain what you wanted me to do."

Dean sighed in a very loud and annoyed fashion. "Scan me with your mojo." Duh.

Cas nodded. "I can do that, of course, but I do not believe I can do anything if I encounter any problems. I _am_ cut off from Heaven." He said the last part with emphasis and Dean thought he looked sad for a moment but one problem at a time, okay bud?

"‘S okay, Cas." Dean said in the most assuring manner he could conduct while drunk and freaking out. "Just check and tell me what’s fucking wrong with mini-Dean. I-I need him on my team."

Cas frowned in confusion but didn’t ask (thank God). He just stepped up to Dean and raised two fingers to the hunter’s forehead. "You might feel this." He warned and Dean nodded, prepared for the worst.

At first there was the usual tingle and warmth of Cas’ grace and Dean toyed with the idea that he could feel it better than anyone else because Cas had touched his soul. Yeah, Dean was special, take that dickwads. Then the graced focused and Dean felt it like a spear, travelling down his spine to pool in his lower back. And fuck, there was a definite stab to what he assumed could be his prostate but it so did not hurt.

"Y-yeah." He stammered and was confused when he sounded all breathless. "Definitely felt that."

Cas was frowning but in concentration now, the differences were subtle but they were there. Dean focused on Cas’ eyes instead of the burning sensation in his lower body. Cas looked like someone who was searching something they couldn’t see. Distant. Focused. Stab, stab, stab.

"Your prostate seems fine, Dean." The angel murmured and was his voice always so gravelly? "But I will check the lobes individually to be sure."

"Wh-what?" shit, was Dean getting hard? That would be awesome but not like this, calm the fuck down soldier.

Cas splayed his hand out to rest his palm against the side of Dean’s head and the heat in his body increased and yes, his dick was totally ignoring his orders and perking up fast than he could comprehend.

"Anterior lobe is intact."

"Cas."

"Posterior as well."

Fucking hell, Dean already felt himself leaking in his underwear. His legs felt unstable and he realized dizzily that he was gripping Cas’ lapels again.

"Lateral and median lobes are normal as well." Cas’ stern eyes met Dean’s lidded ones. "Are you sure you are having a problem?"

"Fuck." Dean hissed out when Cas’ grace kept prodding his prostate. His dick was goddamn jumping in his jeans now. "I can’t come, Cas."

Cas tilted his head to the side. "I assume you mean you are unable to achieve orgasm?" he nodded when Dean did. "Your prostate is not inflamed, I will check your ejaculatory ducts now."

"O- _kay_!" yeah, Dean totally squeaked there because fucking hell, Cas’ grace was forcing its way through Dean’s body the way spunk would and he fucking felt as if he was going to come. "Fuck." He growled and reach down to squeeze himself. Yup, impending orgasm right there with Cas right in front of him and the angel’s grace inside of him.

"Stand still." Cas reprimanded and Dean did not need that right now. Did not need a grace-induced prostate exam while at the same time having his dom-kink indulged.

"I-I _can’t_." He huffed out but Cas didn’t seem to notice.

"Your ducts are beautiful, Dean." The angel remarked in his usually neutral tone and fuck, why was that hot? "Perhaps there is something wrong with your testosterone levels?" he met Dean’s desperate eyes but the look Dean gave apparently flew right over the angel’s head. "I will check your testes as well."

"N-no, you know what?" but Dean didn’t get any further before he felt Cas’ warm grace wrapping around his tight balls. Dean gasped and fisted Cas’ coat. "Jesus _Christ_."

"Don’t blaspheme." Cas chided almost absentmindedly and Dean flung his head back, so fucking ready to just rut against the angel until he came. Cas kept his hand on Dean’s face. "Both of your testis seem fine, Dean." Cas frowned slightly. "If a little full, you certainly haven’t ejaculated in a while."

 _You fucking tell me!_ Dean wanted to scream but couldn’t because all his breath was robbed of him at every turn. He was basically humping his own hand now but it wasn’t fucking enough. But oh God, he was _so close_. He so needed to come and he was right there, just a little more, fucking please!

"Your whole reproductive system seems fine." Cas stated calmly and yes, _there_ was that pull. Dean held his breath unconsciously while Cas let his grace all but fucking squeeze Dean’s heavy balls. "Your testes."

"C-Cas!"

"Your ejaculatory duct."

Oh shit, he was coming, now. In his pants. Fuck, fuck, fuck. "Cas, wait!"

"And your prostate. All of this seems to be in working order." Cas scowled at him when Dean tugged desperately at his coat. "Stand still, I am almost done. I will just check to see if your prostate reacts normally to stimuli."

"No, Cas, wait—" he cut himself off with a deep moan when he felt Cas’ grace graze him _just fucking right_. He pawed desperately at his jeans, trying to open them before this happened; before he fucking stained them like a goddamn teenager.

"Yes, your responses are quite normal so—"

"Fuck, _Cas_ , coming, I’m coming."

"—I don’t think you have anything to worry about."

Dean screamed wordlessly as his orgasm ripped out of him. Was forced out of him, he would later claim. His dick jumped painfully in his pants, confined and pressed against his body. It fucking hurt but it hurt so wonderfully that Dean couldn’t even hope to stop that choked little sob that escaped him as he came in thick spurts. The relief was so intense he could barely breathe.

It wasn’t until he finished that he realized he had fallen against the angel and actually bit down on Cas’ shoulder. Cas didn’t seem to mind, or care or whatever. He just stood there with his hand still against Dean face and Dean realized foggily that the angel was still massaging his prostate with his grace but gently now.

"Yes." Cas said after a moment that was much too short in Dean’s intoxicated mind. "This is a completely normal reaction to prostate stimuli." He pulled out to look down at Dean but Dean didn’t fucking move, alright? Couldn’t and wouldn’t meet the angel’s eyes right now. Was frankly embarrassed enough to just pack it up and go back down to Hell. "I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Dean."

"I-I…" Dean couldn’t finish that sentence to save his life.

Cas quirked his lips in that smile of his and steered Dean to the bed even as his grace left Dean’s insides. He felt empty. "I am not a physician, Dean, nor do I understand everything human but I do believe the male’s ability to achieve orgasm may be connected to outer influences as well, correct?"

"What?" Dean asked and totally garbled that word in his exhaustion.

Cas sighed but quirked his lips again when Dean all but fell down on the bed. "I believe you are simply stressed, Dean. You should try to relax."

"You relax with the end of the world resting on your shoulders." Dean muttered and grimaced when he shifted his dick around in his sticky boxers. He was too tired to get up and clean but waking up to his dick glued to his balls would be disgusting to say the least.

Cas glanced down when he noticed what Dean was doing. "I don’t need to relax, Dean." He stated calmly and reached down to touch Dean lightly on the abdomen and just like that Dean was clean. Fucking angel mojo for the win. "I do not have the same need to ejaculate as you humans do."

Dean was totally falling asleep in the middle of this conversation. "You should try it." He mumbled even as his head lolled to the side and his eyelids drooped.

Cas actually smiled at that but Dean missed it as the familiar darkness of sleep enveloped him. "Sleep now, Dean." Cas mumbled and gently brushed the hunter’s forehead to give him pleasant dreams, at least this once.

  



End file.
